WHO AM I?

who am i, and what have i become? I AM so frustrated with myself that i losing part myself, the hadi that i knew before is almost dead and gone, and the new hadi is soo wild,, rebelious, and who knows what else. haish

Learning to open my heart

After a month over im beginning to open my heart to this girl, but the prob the girl that i beginning to have feeling is a super popular girl, yes we chat and exchange numbers but what are the odds me with her.. only time will tell

Bad Habits Change you

Karma hits hard

Everyday i wake up and things hit me continuously non stop... but thats the deal with the universe that i have to bare with, and what makes me sad is that a girl that i care only use me when she is down or in danger. Im like her place to let all negative impact to me, even she knows i like her but im only her play toy when she needs me either than that i wont hear a new from her.. LIFE SUCKS SO FAR. Well theres alot extreme things to do out there then to think of this matter. History repeats itself. i thank melissa and all those who are involve. LOVE YOU ALL SOOO MUCHHHHHHH FFFF

At times My life can be Speechless............. MADNESS DI GENTING

Now listen to me baby Before i love and leave you They call me heart breaker I don't wanna decieve you If you fall for me I'm not easy to please I'mma tear you apart Told you from the start, baby from the start. I'm only gonna break break ya break break ya heart.

Theres not point trying to hide it No point trying to erase me I know i got a problem By doing this behavior and I know karma's gonna get me back for being so cold Like a big bad wolf I'm born to be bad and bad to the bone If you fall for me I'm only gonna tear you apart Told ya from the start

Story of my life, searching for the right But it keeps avoiding me Sorrow in my soul cause it seems that wrong Really loves my company He's more than a girl and this is more than love The reason that the sky is blue But clouds are rolling in because I'm gone again
And to her I just can't be true And I know that she knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills her inside To know that I am happy with some other girl I can see her dying

I don't wanna do this anymore I don't wanna be the reason why Every time I walk out the door I see her die a little more inside I don't wanna hurt her anymore I don't wanna take away her life
I don't wanna be a murderer

I feel it in the air as I'm doing my hair Preparing for another date A kiss up on my cheek, she's here reluctantly As if I'm gonna be out late I say I won't be long just hanging with the guys
A lie I didn't have to tell Because i only know where I'm about to go And i know it very well

Our love, her trust I might as well take a gun And put it to her head Get it over with I don't wanna do this

Network connection down

wont be connected to any internet services including Facebook, tweeter if possible msn till i find the sense to be online till then HADI PEREIRA SIGNING OUT

im 21 soon and im asking permission HAHAHAHAH WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!! how bout i be baby back again since im not allowed to do mistake ma... always must do the right thing... HELLOOOOOOOO EXPERIENCE IS THE BEST TEACHER.

I know deep down you upset with me even you wont admit it because its not the first time i experience this kinda things but basically my entire life experience. I am sick and all i wanted was you to be there but you seem no mood at all to even talk to me or chat with me. I can see your pretending when you chat with me. I know im wrong for doing so, i didn't ask to get sick, but i still make the afford to meet you even when i was beginning to get sick just to see you because i really missed you. Even now i feel restless because there's never enough when im with you. If possible i want to be with you every minute and every second, but things got into the way how am i to actually overcome it if its out of my hands. I can just be in silence.

what should i do when things dont go according to plan

why i always end up in various types of mess which i didnt intend to actually have any of them

how am i going to make those around me happy and at the same time satisfying my needs

where am i going to find a peaceful solution without hurting anyone

when is the time i will be able to be on my own

i Never meant to

its been bad this pass day, on sat my car totally broke down and i have to chip in my own cash, but i dont mind cause somehow i feel proud of doing it because its my money repairing it. But the main thing is i hurt the one person that i actually love and i really dont mean too. I wish i didnt do does things that i did. I been stress with my report, its my final term and im depress. I want to express it out but you working, so i keep on building my frustration till i just explode. But its wrong of me because i know you need me more then i need you. But due to my failure controling my anger i just realease it all out. This was the side of me where i dont want you to experience with me but somehow faith want you to see it. I donno what to say but just that im sorry.

Safe behind these windows and these parapets of stone ( Ya Rite)
Gazing at the people outside me
All my life I watch them as I hide in here alone
Hungry for the histories they show me
All my life I memorize their faces
Knowing them as they will never know me
All my life I wonder how it feels to pass a day
Not hidden from them
But part of them

And out there
Living in the sun
Give me one day out there
All I ask is one To hold forever
Out there
Where they all live unawares What I'd give
What I'd dare Just to live one day out there

Out there among the millers and the weavers and their gf
Through the roofs and gables I can see them
Ev'ry day they shout and scold and go about their lives
Heedless of the gift it is to be them
If I was in their skin I'd treasure ev'ry instant

Out there
Strolling by the seine
Taste a morning out there
Like ordinary men
Who freely walk about there Just one day and then
I swear I'll be content
With my share
Won't resent
Won't despair
Old and bent
I won't care
I'll have spent
One day
Out there

J’ai longtemps parcouru son corps, Effleuré cents fois son visage, J’ai trouvé de l’or, Et même quelques étoiles en essuyant ses larmes, Et j'ai appris par coeur la pureté de ses formes Parfois je les dessine encore,
Elle fait partie de moi,

Je veux juste une dernière danse, Avant l’ombre et l’indifférence, Un vertige puis le silence, Je veux juste une dernière danse, Je l’ai connue trop tôt, Mais c’est pas de ma faute, La flèche a traversé ma peau, C’est une douleur qui se garde, Qui fait plus de bien que de mal, Mais je connais l’histoire, Il est déjà trop tard, Dans son regard, On peut apercevoir qu’elle se prépare, Au long voyage,

Je peux mourir demain, Ca ne change rien, J’ai reçu de ses mains, Le bonheur ancré dans mon âme, C’est même trop pour un seul homme, Et je l’ai vue partir sans rien dire, Il fallait seulement qu’elle respire, Merci d’avoir enchanté ma vie, Avant l’ombre et l’indifférence, Un vertige puis le silence, je veux juste une dernière danse.

What has life though me so far?? well perhaps for me it define on the type of song im listening to. There come a point where i cant fight this feeling anymore. I forgotten what i started fighting for. Who am i, what am i trying to actually prove? why i am doing it in the first place? when will the time be for me to really look my inner self? what will i do when i found my true self? and how will i face it when the time comes? For my strength is actually my weakness. Am i really ready when the time comes? only time, experience and moments will tell.

The reason

I'm not a perfect person

There's many things I wish I didn't do

But I continue learning

I never meant to do those things to you

And so I have to say before I go

That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me

To change who I used to be

A reason to start over new

And the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you

It's something I must live with every day

And all the pain I put you through

I wish that I could take it all away

And be the one who catches all your tears

That's why I need you to hear

I'm not a perfect person

I never meant to do those things to you

And so I have to say before I go

That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me

To change who I used to be

A reason to start over new

And the reason is you

I've found a reason to show

A side of me you didn't know

A reason for all that I do

And the reason is you

Its time for a drastic change.... A moment of boy to man

Feel of the heart

Yea i tell you something, I think you'll understand,

when i say that something, I want to hold your hand, For i want to hold your hand....

Owh plz say to me, you'll let me be your man,

and plz say to me, you'll let me hold your hand, now let me hold your hand, i want to hold your hand...

And when i touch you, i feel happy inside, its such a feeling that my love i cant hide, i cant hide.......

Yea you got that something, i think you understand,

when i feel that something, i want to hold your hand, I want to hold your hand, i want to hold your hand.....

Just let me hold your hand

HE HE

Its been awhile since i updated my blog. Well all i can say is i found her i feel so comfortable being besides her i feel like we been together for a long time, there was no doubt in my feelings for her. She just right. She was always there for me and i hurt her in the pass bout now she's mine and i want to take care of her and not repeat the mistake that i did before. I just want to make things work out with her.

well i say it out even things was spilt out before i could do anything. but i say it out and im like speechless and donno what to say. The feeling that i kept for sometimes finally out. But i make a wrong move by not knowing what i was doing. Ahhh i feel so stupid well no point crying over spill milk. T.T

What have i Done

What can i say i made wrong decision which affect people i care the most but i was blinded but i myself not sure what............. IM SORRY

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